This is a long ramble about what I want to write but can't

I never feel creative at all in the evening.

Why is that?

I mean, I was talking to an English major friend of mine who mentioned National Novel Writing Month, and I thought to myself, "What a great idea! I can finally get started on my super special awesome fantasy novel that I've been dreaming over for about seven years." 

Now I am here, at the computer, poised over a Word document, fingers ready to fly with heretofore unrealized genius and inspiration from the highest muse....and I have nothing. 

No words worth saying at all. 

This is frustrating.

Can I just tell you about my characters?

Gariven is an awesome guy. I like him a lot. He makes me laugh, because he's got such a stick up his behind about EVERYTHING. I mean, he isn't pretentious without cause; he's the heir to the biggest hold in the southern plains. He's been raised to take over for his father, and he's pretty smart, too. He knows how to fight; he likes twin short swords, which may be impractical. I have no idea. I don't fight; I write. Anyway, he's been at the Court of the Council every winter since he turned fifteen, rubbing shoulders with all the other prospective nobility, finding out he is pretty much the gods' gift to women, being generally impressive. In spite of his general awesomeness, he hasn't gotten into any real trouble. He has a little brother, much younger, of whom he is rather fond. He never uses contractions; court manners, remember? Oh, and he's an elf. I have elves. With magic. He has lots of magic, more than most other elves, actually, and elves have more magic than men. He is particularly good at scenting it, or tracking it, and he is the only elf he knows of that can read minds and communicate telepathically. He doesn't do it often, and he hasn't told anyone. He has a decent relationship with his parents; his mother tends to smother him a bit, while his father is disciplined but not cold. A golden boy kinda guy, really. Everything is going his way, at this point. He's twenty-two now. Oh, physically, he is taller than average, but only by an inch or two. Blond hair that's shaggy when not slicked back. Black-brown eyes. 

Playing opposite this paragon is Adoran. Another really awesome guy. He is my standard dude with tragic past. Stereotypes, I has them. But that doesn't stop me from making him amazing anyway. I am sort of in love with this character I have created. Is that strange? You are probably saying yes. Psychoanalyze away, because I have NO REGRETS. Back to Adoran. He is the sort of dire guy that says grim things but thinks something snarky. Sometimes he says the snarky thing instead of the grim thing. He thinks irritating everyone else is hilarious, and that's kinda the extent of his humor, at least, at the beginning of this thing. He is hard, and cold, and brutal, but not blood-thirsty. When he was a child, he lived with his mother on the edges of a village, and while life wasn't awful, it wasn't the best. He was a kid, what did he know? He remembers being happy then, when he thinks about it, which isn't often. He tries to forget that he was happy before he came back from the woods one day to find his mother dead on the floor, singed corpse still smoking from the blast of energy that ended his childhood. His name was on the wall. He ran into the woods, survived for a year or two scavenging and stealing into towns. One day, while wandering in the woods, he finds a cabin. When he gets close enough to get a better look, he is captured by a hermit elf who eventually trains and raises him and teaches him how to survive. I forgot to mention Adoran has magic, too. Lots of it. Lots more than Gariven or any elf. And he is a half-breed elf/human. And those are supposed to be impossible in my world. Yes. Truthfully, his back story has given me the worst time trying to figure it out. This version is new. I will probably write another one. Adoran likes projectile weapons: daggers, bow and arrows. He is also very good with a sword. He makes a living now by acting as a courier of messages, packages...it keeps him moving around, out of sight. He is tall and thin, has dark hair, blacker than brown, past his shoulders that he keeps tied back. His eyes are light blue. 

...why do I feel like I am digging more and more into fandom with this thing? I have been told they are essentially Kirk and Spock. Now that I look at it, they are also Charles and Erik. 'Cept the blond stuff, but character-wise? Yep.

TOO BAD. I like these guys. I made them up way before I ever got into fandom of any kind. They make me smile to think about. I drew them a lot a couple of years ago. 

I may or may not be feeling inspired now. Off to try this novel-writing thing!