Lots of words, little substance. Star Wars.

Despite my best efforts, my attempts at arting this evening have collapsed, rather like a cake, which leaves an unappetizing mess behind. Covered in eraser marks and pencil smudges. My cakes are rather odd.

So, Star Wars.

The hot mess that George Lucas spat out in the nineties (I think?) was an attempt to follow up on his wildly geek-popular trilogy of decades earlier. A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi are formulaic and cheesy, but lovable for being so. The characters are memorable, possibly because of, and not in spite of, the acting abilities or lack thereof of the principal cast. I love these original three movies for the lols, is what I am saying. Then came The Phantom Menace.

Lucas decided it was finally time to make the first three films of his hexology (or however that is spelled...or however one conveys the idea of a double trilogy?) and he framed them around everyone's favorite character, Darth Vader. Vader's fanbase was in for a great deal of misfortune, however, because Anakin Skywalker is the whiniest man-child inflicted on a theater audience.

He is supposed to be becoming a respected Jedi Knight, but he throws tantrums at every opportunity, the difference between him and a two-year-old being that when he waves his arms around, he's holding a light saber, and people tend to die. His relationship with his wife, about 10 years his senior, just puts more of Lucas's strange relationship ideals on display . . . definite Oedipal complex. Eugh. At any rate, Ani is not who I had feels over yesterday (except possibly rage feels and creeeeeepy feels because Haydn Christiansen, while pretty, has the most effective rape face I have ever seen when he attempts to be seductive, or suggestive, or even just happy. It's just his face.) My favorite character in the first three movies, hands down, is Obi-wan Kenobi. (I am probably spelling that incorrectly as well.)

While in the older films, he dies fairly quickly and spends the rest of the series as a particularly pushy and vocal spirit ("USE THE DAMN FORCE LUKE SERIOUSLY JUST USE IT" --Obi-wan, paraphrased), he appears first in Phantom Menace as an apprentice himself (to Jedi Liam Neeson, and how cool is that? Also a favorite, and he also dies very quickly, which is annoying and heeeeeeeey just had another thought: what if the first three are actually about Obi-wan? Because his mentor dies at the end of the first, and so did Luke's, and it's Obi-wan who must, in the end, defeat evil...I am satisfied with this interpretation, and I am forever more going to watch the movies assuming Anakin is a side character. Yes.). Obi-wan Kenobi is Jedi Master of sass, which is a large part of why he is so excellent. He is Anakin's master in Attack of the Clones, and he remains so through Rise of the Sith. During these two films, a relationship between Obi-wan and Anakin is developed that makes clear how close they are; Anakin calls Obi-wan a father figure, and Obi-wan clearly cares for Ani as he would a younger brother. They are sent on dangerous missions as a unit, and it is only when they are separated that either one gets into serious trouble. Anakin's progress toward the Dark Side escalates dramatically each time Obi-wan is absent.

Obi-wan sees more than he wants to about his pupil. Still, he clings to hope, never believing the worst until the evidence is placed directly before him. He tries to refuse the order to kill Anakin. Their final battle is where I lost it. Anakin is obviously off his rocker. Obi-wan is confused and betrayed and so very hurt, and he tries so hard to end it before he has to injure Anakin, but Ani won't listen, so Obi-wan has to strike him down.

Obi-wan takes the blame on himself for what happened. He thinks he failed his student, his friend. I think he did the best he could.

He's why I cried yesterday while watching Star Wars, a very unexpected turn of events. May the Force be with him.